My Teef are Gone from my Mouf

Well, not all of them — 6 on top, and 2 back wisdom teeth on the bottom. It feels really weird, but what is making it worse is a sore throat. I developed the sore throat 2 days ago, about 8 hours before the surgery, which is just the worst time you can get a sore throat, I’m thinking.

When I went in, they had me put under from general anesthesia, which was an interesting experience. One moment you’re nervous as hell, breathing some sweet scent out of a mask and the wrist where the IV was went cold all of a sudden. Then it was 3 seconds of pure bliss, the “Ohhhhhhhhhhhh yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah” kind. I kind of smiled at the feeling, and the nurse knew it, she pressed down on the mask a bit more, so I got a good whiff. The anesthesiologist said to count backwards from 10, and so I said, “Ten …” Then lights out.

What seemed like an instant later, was really 2 hours later, and I was lying in a bed with a oven-warmed blanket on, and I blnked groggily, looked around, and then “What a tic! I’m still dreaming!” popped in my mind because what has to be the hottest nurse in existence was standing right by my beside. She had long black hair, was latino, had a great smile, and hands warmer than even the blankets she was pulling off of me. If she had a glow over her head from the lights, I may have cried from joy.

She then closed the curtain, sat me up, removed my surgical gown and grabbed my belonging bag with all my clothes. Except it wasn’t my bag, so here I was, standing in nothing but my boxers, freezing, and she’s holding me up. She called for another nurse to find the bag, and for a whole minute of heaven, she rubbed me and held me close to keep me warm (it was bloody cold in there.) I couldn’t talk, all I could was smile as best as I could through a numb mouth that didn’t feel like smiling. In my mind, I was trying a sly grin, but I have a feeling my grin was a goofy one. If I could talk, I would’ve said, “It’s nipply in here …”

The other nurse, who didn’t take her sweet time finding my damn bag, reached through the curtain with my belongings, and the pretty nurse helped me put them on one by one. Then she wheeled me out to my family, and my roommate said I had this look of shell-shock on my face, and thought it was from the meds and anesthesia, but that wasn’t it. I was wide awake, I assure you.

So yeah, it kind of sucks having to drink cold liquids and soft food for a week or so, but at least I had a hot nurse. We all pray for it (men do, anyways), and I got lucky this time. The hospital’s brochure prides itself on your care and comfort, and I can say without a doubt that they excel at it.

If any of you are near Tampa, go to Tarpon Springs which is nearby, and visit Helen Ellis Memorial Hospital.

Oh, and thank you Lucy and Cindy, both of your kind words in the comments yesterday helped immensely. I appreciate them very much.

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